If you’ve ever sat across from your favorite people at dinner, smiling politely while mentally ticking off tomorrow’s meeting agenda… hi, you’re not alone. I’ve been there more times than I’d like to admit—physically present, emotionally tethered to my inbox, pretending I’m relaxed while my brain is quietly editing pitch decks or rehearsing tomorrow’s “quick call” that’s definitely going to run long.
And here’s the thing: it’s not always about being a workaholic. Sometimes it’s just how modern life is wired. Notifications don’t clock out. Our brains don’t neatly shut down just because the office is closed. But at some point, I realized that if I didn’t start practicing how to come home to myself, I was going to miss the parts of life I actually work for—the conversation, the quiet, the ritual of being with people (or even just with my own thoughts) without carrying an invisible to-do list everywhere I go.
So these six habits? They’re what I’ve built, slowly and deliberately, to reclaim my presence at the table—and beyond. If your work brain tends to tag along a little too often, you might find something here that helps you call it back home.
1. I Give My Brain a “Commute” (Even When I Work from Home)
One of the sneakiest reasons our minds cling to work outside office hours? We never gave them a moment to transition. Without a true off-ramp from work mode, we stay in a subtle hum of hyper-productivity—whether or not we’re still logged on.
To counter this, I started b
This tiny, physical ritual sends a signal to my brain: the day is done. You can rest now.
2. I Anchor Into Something That’s Real and Right in Front of Me
Here’s a little trick I started doing at dinner when I realized I’d halfway drifted into Slack messages: I pick one physical sensation and lean into it, hard. The temperature of the drink in my hand. The way the food actually tastes. The feel of the napkin or the chair beneath me. Something immediate, tactile, and grounding.
The goal isn’t to banish thoughts—it’s to bring yourself back to what’s real. I’ve found that focusing on just one detail often creates a domino effect, gently bringing my attention back to the present moment without judgment or effort.
You could try this with scents, music, or even the feeling of a pet curled at your feet. Anything that roots you in the now helps remind your brain it doesn’t need to live in a Google Doc 24/7.
3. I Stop Trying to Be “Efficient” With My Evenings
This one was humbling. For years, I treated my evenings like a second shift: workout, meal prep, inbox clean-up, skincare routine, scroll TikTok for “inspiration” (but really just work ideas in disguise). It was productivity, dressed up as wellness.
Now, I choose slowness as a form of resistance. If I’m eating dinner, I’m not also doing laundry. If I’m watching a show, I’m not “catching up” on DMs. One thing at a time.
I don’t always get it right. But every time I protect space from the pressure to maximize it, I get a little better at remembering that I’m not a machine—I’m a person who deserves to rest.
A study found that role spillover—when work thoughts continue during non-work hours—is a leading factor in burnout, especially for high-achieving individuals and creatives. Protecting non-work time isn’t indulgent—it’s essential for long-term clarity and creativity.
4. I Keep a “Mental Parking Lot” Nearby
Even with the best intentions, thoughts sneak in. I’ll be mid-conversation and—bam—I remember that one client file I forgot to send or the task I swore I’d finish before logging off.
Instead of wrestling the thought down or mentally spinning in it, I jot it down quickly in what I call my “mental parking lot.” It’s just a note on my phone (or a small notepad if I’m analog that day), and it gives the idea somewhere to go so it doesn’t take up space at the table.
Writing it down lets me release it. It’ll be there when I’m ready. But it doesn’t get to be the main character of my evening.
5.I Rehearse a Boundary Phrase That Feels Like Me
One of the reasons my brain clings to work is because I’ve trained it to think I’m always available. And sometimes, reclaiming mental space starts with practicing the language that supports it.
Now, I keep a few go-to phrases in my back pocket. Not robotic scripts, but gentle, firm reminders I can use with myself—or others—when work threatens to creep into personal time.
A few that work for me:
- “I’ll revisit that tomorrow when I’m fresh.”
- “It’s okay to not respond right now.”
- “This moment deserves my full attention.”
It might feel a little awkward at first. But over time, your nervous system gets the memo: you’re allowed to log off for real.
6. I Let Joy Be a Legitimate Metric for Success
Here’s the most powerful shift I’ve made: I stopped measuring my day only by what I crossed off my to-do list—and started measuring it by how I felt during it.
Did I laugh? Did I feel connected to someone? Did I let myself be still, even for five minutes? These small, non-quantifiable wins have become the new gold stars in my mental end-of-day review.
Because here’s the truth: no promotion or perfectly polished inbox is going to replace the richness of presence. The older I get, the more I realize—being fully here is the most ambitious thing I can do.
Studies in Positive Psychology show that moments of micro-joy—tiny experiences of pleasure or connection—can have a compounding effect on well-being, improving emotional resilience and lowering perceived stress.
The Radiance Recap
If your mind tends to linger at work long after you’ve left, let these reminders walk you gently home:
- Create a personal sign-off. Even a small end-of-day ritual helps your brain know it’s time to shift.
- Engage your senses. Use touch, scent, or taste to root yourself in the present moment.
- Choose slowness over productivity. Your evenings aren’t a second shift—they’re your life.
- Write it down and let it go. Parking work thoughts lets you stay present without losing them.
- Measure the feeling, not just the finish. Presence and peace are powerful forms of progress.
The Art of Logging Off—Even When Your Brain Won’t
If you’ve ever felt guilty for not being able to “turn off” your work brain, I hope this reminded you: you’re not broken. You’re just living in a world that’s constantly on—and learning to draw lines in the sand takes time, courage, and a little creativity.
What’s helped me isn’t a perfect system or a strict schedule—it’s learning to listen to myself. To ask: What do I need to come back to this moment? Sometimes the answer is as simple as a breath. Or a bite. Or the warmth of conversation I almost missed because I was stuck in tomorrow.
So tonight, maybe you let yourself be here. Let your laptop sleep. Let your mind soften. Let your dinner taste like something you didn’t rush through. The work will be there. You, fully present at your own table? That’s the real priority.
Lifestyle Features Editor
Margaux’s expertise lies in turning the ordinary into the extraordinary. She writes about home, habits, and daily rituals with a perspective that blends practicality and elegance—reminding readers that balance can be beautiful.
